Thursday, January 27, 2011

At Odds With Love--Discussion Thread

  Jane reads Phineas Finn to dying granny.  Though passingly acquainted with the works of Anthony Trollope, I confess to having to closely con the wiki entry for the plot.  (Young man, through a series of events, wins a seat in Parliament, is unable to win the hands of several heiresses, eventually resigns his seat and returns home to marry his sweetheart, Mary Flood Jones.)  It sounds nice but on your deathbed?...I intend having a copy of Caroline's Waterloo and The Promise of Happiness to speed me homeward.
Got mail?

At Lady Grimstone's the mail is in the hall, under the tiger's head.  (Appropriately stuffed and mounted, I hope.)

At the private hospital in Carlisle, her cap 'was a plain Sister Dora' instead of the goffered muslin trifle from her last hospital.  I looked her up and Sister Dora (whom I had never heard of but whom they compare with Florence Nightengale) was a CofE nurse in the Midlands during the eighteen hundreds.  Her epitaph read, 'Quietly I came among you and quietly let me go'.  She's kind of a babe in that cap.
Sister Dora

Bessy says to Jane 'I just wish your granny could see us...like as not she can'. 

Nik has left her a roll of notes by her plate in the morning....Betty Debbie tells me that she wishes her husband would do that.  (Here, I crassly imagine her stuffing the roll into her Maidenform.) I often wonder what the financial set-up is for our heroines upon their marriage to the RDD.  Rolls of notes to begin with and then a check book and an allowance after she is established in the house.  But is that allowance put in their own separate accounts or is it to be mentally tabulated and taken from a common account? (I'm leaning towards the former.)  I have a friend who does it that way--her husband puts a set amount into her account for the household expenses and since the money is regarded as hers, she is encouraged to be as thrifty and prudent as possible so that any leftover can go for things like Gina Fratini models.  My husband and I do it the other way--The money is in a common account and when I am off to shop for fripperies and ask how much he'd like to keep things down to he says awful, quelling things like, 'I trust you.'

4 comments:

  1. I don't know why the penny didn't drop sooner, but where are the credit cards in The Canon? Or, to be more au courant than that, chip and pin technology?

    In other words, why does Araminta get a wodge of money at all? Open an account, give her an ATM card, a credit card, whatever -- and then some notes and coppers for those situations when you need actual cash.

    But I know the answer -- The Great Betty didn't do things that way. And I respect that.

    Betty Ross and I have joint accounts, except that I have a business account for tax reasons.

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  2. I've often wanted a checking account from an RDD - "Not enough? You've only to say!"

    Instead I tend to get comments like your husband says, "I trust you."

    And as for that wondrous thing a "clothing allowance," HAH! For years, in our leanest times, every time I bought anything (and usually because it was absolutely necessary) I had the feeling I was stealing. Nothing my husband said, just my own silliness. Now that I can buy clothes when and as I want, we still have no "clothing allowance," or even a clothing budget. When I need (or want) something we discuss it and I do it. Easy! Of course, I have nothing approaching a Gina Fratini. I did get a lovely, completely unnecessary red leather swing coat last month, from a friend who received it as a gift and she couldn't wear it. It was a bargain. I HAD to have it. ;-)

    me<><

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  3. I have a pretty generous household account for groceries, school supplies, flowers, clothing, etc...If I wanted to save up for a Gina Fratini I could.

    My mother-in-law used to have to keep track of literally every dime she spent. It wasn't that she was restricted in how much she could spend, it was just that my darling FIL was very detail oriented and liked to keep their accounts accurate. My MIL finally rebelled and asked for a 'household account' - and was much happier about family finances thereafter.

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  4. This household account idea is a good one. We do the joint account thing at our house. My husband IS a "chartered accountant" (well, a mathemetician who works for *gasp* the IRS but close enough). That means he wants to keep track of every dime, but let me tell ya, it gets away from us all the time. I think we might just have to switch over.
    When we were first married (living the simple life... one baby few responsibilities and no funds) we never spent over $10 without consulting each other and the budget. I used to go to the local outlet mall with my college friend. She was married to her very own RAD - Rich American Doctor - I kid you not, and he's the nicest man... Oh. and after their first date, a double with a friend, he turned to his friend and said, "I'm going to marry that girl" and darned if he didn't up and do it.. I never realized until now that he IS a hero from Neeldom... but I digress. Anyway I used to encourage her to dip into her allowance. It was almost as much fun as doing it myself! :-)

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