|It was Stu's disco inferno and he'd stay until he burned that mother down...|
Who you marry matters. I had that one figured out early and thank heavens I did or I wouldn't have been so blessedly quick at snatching up the Christmas present that was Mijnheer van Voorhees when he landed on my doorstep nearly fourteen years ago. We were young and adaptable (the narrow-minded might consider that a reason not to marry) but I think that helped us as we grew into the people we are today. (Nearly perfect, Bettys! Oh, and I've got a bridge I can sell you...)
Still, it leaves me cold to think of who I dated before the little Mihnheer. Life would have gone in another direction. I might have delivered in an Argentinian hospital as one of their future wives did or been a permanent guest at another's All-Night/Everyday Disco Pity Party of Imagined Grievances or OWNED A DOG (!).
Anyway, I think we like to think of ourselves as fixed points in the little Universe of Us with everyone and everything revolving to our moods and whims when we're more like promontories (some more firm and rocky than others) shaped by the geography and weather around us (I feel very Carl Sagan-esque.) and that our choice of spouse (the person who will share the most time with us) can push us in directions we didn't plan.
I picked up a book I've been dying to read the other day (Leave Her to Heaven--Ben Ames Williams--the one that movie was based on (P.S. It was melodrama but awesome melodrama.) and some characters are talking about the hero in the end:
"...she's a grand woman, so he's bound to be all right. Or if he ain't, he will be, married to her. A woman mostly makes a man the way she wants him, 'fore she gets through, if she's in love with him."--Leave Her to Heaven
I don't entirely agree that love can always shape things so happily (unfortunately) but do think who you marry can dramatically effect how happy you might (not will) be in this life.
Question: No question. Discuss.