Never the Time and the Place - 1985

 

I was several pages into Never the Time and the Place before I remembered the plot...or rather, some of the plot. Imagine a light bulb( here, I'll help - ☼◄that's my lightbulb).  This is one of the few books in the Canon that features a full-on white(cream)satin wedding!  From the beginning to the end, this love story moves along at a cracking pace. Put on your running shoes, and let's get started:

Week One (sometime in October):

Josephine Dowling (hereafter to be referred to as 'Jo' in the interests of brevity and not getting carpal tunnel) is 25, tall, gorgeous and built.  Not only that her relationship status is engaged. While taking Cuthbert(the dog) for walkies, she contemplates her cold feet.  Sure, it's a cold, windy, sodden sort of day, but that's not her problem.  She's just not sure she wants to get married at all.  Her thoughts, plus the wind and rain nicely mask the sound of a great socking Bentley that nearly runs her and Cuthbert down. Her cold feet are nothing compared to the glacial blue eyes and frosty manner of the handsomely rugged (or is that ruggedly handsome...see cover art) man.  Words are spoken and they both go their separate ways, her to her parents home, he to Branton house...just a few miles away.  He loses little time in ferreting out the name of his One True Love.  Oh yeah, it's love at first fight.

In the kind of coincidence seldom found outside the pages Neels, Jo just so happens to be the Ward Sister in charge of the 'gyny' cases at St. Michael's, and Tall Dark and Handsome will soon be spending a month as locum for Dr. Bull - the regular surgeon of women's 'parts' at St. Michael's.  Up until recently TD and H has been engaged also - but as this plays very little part in the proceedings, we'll ignore it right up until the ex-fiancee rears her figuratively ugly head. His name? Julius van Tacx.  Relationship status: It's Complicated.

The part of Tony the Fiancee will be played by Malcolm. Being engaged to Malcolm isn't entirely a piece of cake...there are...shall we say, some problems. 

• First and foremost is the fact that Malcolm's mum and Jo do. not. get. along.
• Malcolm can't wait to move back to his hometown and share a medical practice with his dad.
• His hometown is pretty far away from her hometown.
• He tells her his mother can teach her to sew her own clothes, instead of frittering away money on cute, stylish, well-fitting, new clothes, fripperies.
• His mother's taste in clothing was as remote from fashion as the moon was from cheese.
• Malcolm drives a Ford Granada and considers The Golden Egg good enough for a dinner date.

• He calls her 'Old Girl'.

What it really boils down to is the fact that she doesn't love him.  So she breaks their engagement  He's not exactly brokenhearted. ..which sort of makes it worse for her.  Mr. van Tacx is the first person she runs into. Hullo, had a tiff?

Jo is not in the mood to be consoled. It's off to a very hot bath to cry her eyes out in peace. She may not have been in love with the tick, but she's had an emotional wrench just the same.

Mr. van Tacx stops by Jo's office to beg a pot of tea where Jo increases her hold on his heart by coming up with cheese sandwiches.

Please don't call me 'sir' outside the hospital.

I doubt if we'll run into each other.

There is a divinity that shapes our ends...rough hew them how we may. (I ♥ Betty)

He's quoting Shakespeare?  Call mama and engrave the invitations.

Well, not quite yet.  First Julius takes Jo out for a bite and some advice to the lovelorn. Editor's Note: The first time I read this book, I didn't get why Jo would be upset over the broken engagement.  She dumped him - move on!  Upon re-reading I have much more sympathy for her.  Yes, she dumped him, but it wasn't because she was shallow or flighty.  Her reasons were sound, but that doesn't mean it didn't hurt - and to have Malcolm dismiss her so lightly afterwards would have been like pouring salt in the wound. 

Julius offers a shoulder to weep on, some advice, and a hearty pub dinner. Nice. He trots out his broken engagement as proof that he knows what it's like to be jilted (mind you, he doesn't seem broken hearted about it).
To sum up week one: Josephine and Malcolm break up. Josephine doesn't think she likes Mr. van Tacx. In spite of this, Julius starts making friendly advances .

Week Two:

Jo waits until the weekend to break the news of her new relationship status (single) to her parents.  They aren't very fussed about it - they never really liked Malcolm (or his mother).  Jo and Julius run into each other at Lady Forsythe's party...Julius drives Jo back up to London.  Julius is gone for 3 days...Jo misses him. Julius kisses a surprised Josephine. Dinner together - with a casual, no kiss, good night.

Malcolm sends a Malcolm-ish letter...in which he requests to split the proceeds from selling a clock that they purchased together - which sends Jo off to cry in the bathtub.

Julius is quick to notice the puffy eyes and red nose. 
Him: Buck up!
Her: You have no right to stick your nose in.
Him: I'm working on that...you need a holiday - at least 10 days.
He wants to get rid of me, thinks Jo...and that hurts.

Week Three:
Jo takes a holiday at home. Her pride over the broken engagement had suffered more than her heart. We may now dismiss Malcolm entirely.

Week Four:

Jo's holiday, continued. Julius shows up for the weekend - right where they met the first time. After church Julius invites Jo to spend the afternoon with him at Stourhead - where he eyes the damp statues of the grotto with an unromantic eye. I find it hard to work up any romantic feelings over statues.  Well, that's a relief. Jo wonders where romance has gone...Oh, Julius has some romance all right, he hauls out his great big Cookbook O'Love and gives her a recipe....no one needs time to fall in love - one may not realise it when it happens, but sooner or later one becomes aware. Yes, he's just given her the recipe for a Dawning Realization.
As the weekend winds down, Julius takes his leave of Mr. and Mrs. Dowling with a handshake and a front row view of him kissing Jo...unhurriedly. Mum knows which way the wind is blowing, even if Jo doesn't.

Week Five:
Back at hospital the other nurses tell Jo that Mr. van Tacx is going on a date with the small, sexy, gold digger, Moira.  Julius is much too smart for Moira.  He invited Sister Clark (in her fifties) and Mr. Dean, the elderly Senior Pharmacist ...there was no way Moira could compete. Julius tells her it was a case of safety in numbers -
 but he always feels safe with her.
Mr. Bull returns. Julius leaves.

Week Six:

Home for the weekend. It's nasty weather - biting wind, icy gale, is it the same weather in Holland? Julius would have no idea, he's sitting in her parent's cozy sitting room discussing anaesthesia with her dad. Did she spend any time thinking of him?Never. What, never? Hardly every. She does accept an invitation to go for a walk on the morrow.  Six miles through a nasty mixture of frozen mud and ruts, but that is mere piffle to a Neels gal.
Paging Dr. Dowling, paging Dr. Dowling! There's been an accident in your neck of the woods...A milk tanker, a furniture van and a small family car have tangled and need medical attention.
After church Julius asks Jo to go back to Stourhead - this time they tour the church. I should like to be married here.  To you, Josephine. Umm...think about it while I'm gone. Yeah, I'm going back to Holland. (at this point you can either channel Arnold  "I'll be back" or MacArthur  "I shall return)
Jo goes back at the hospital wondering about Julius.  This is a very unsettled week for Jo. Where is Julius? When will he be back?

Week Seven:
Julius is back!  He invites Jo to dinner at his new flat.  The flat that he purchased from a friend, because he knew that he and Jo would want their own place in London. His proposal is renewed, vital statistics given (he is possessed of one father, three married sisters and two unmarried brothers). He can arrange for her to leave the hospital at the end of the week, and they can be married in three weeks in the Stourton church.  It's to be a full on wedding, cream satin, two bridesmaids and all the family.

Weeks Eight and Nine:
Wedding preparations, shopping for wedding clothes. Missing Julius.

Week Ten:

Wedding at Stourton and honeymoon in York. Dawning Realization. On the way back to her parents house, Julius makes his first attempt to tell Jo how he feels.  He tries again on their way to London..unfortunately Jo is asleep.  He tries AGAIN at the London flat...but is interrupted by Mrs. Twigg, the housekeeper. They drive to the ferry...talking about lots of things, but not love.  I do get that - I'd want to look someone in the eye right then, not dodge traffic. A fairly passionate kiss in front of the family retainers - Jo giving as good as she got. Another interrupted attempt by Julius to have The Talk.

Week Eleven:
Holland. Magda the Ex-Fiancee. Jo invites Magda to stay for lunch and then Magda implies she and Julius will spend some time together...Julius is out very late. Jo chews him out like a fishwife. Julius quietly tells her she's as blind as a bat and they will have a TALK in the morning. He's not there in the morning, so she ends up going to the village school's Christmas party by herself.  In spite of not speaking the language, Jo manages to be the life of the party - to the extent of starting a conga line with all the students and the teachers.  Julius takes her home, puts up a do not disturb sign and finally has The Talk. At last - the time and the place, but only you can tell me if I have the loved one...some delightful snogging ensues. The End.

Rating: Julius was delightful...twinkling eyes before a kiss, twitch of a smile before a kiss, advice to the lovelorn, and he's a pretty fast mover.  From the time he met her in October(whilst she was engaged) until the final delightful snogging sometime near Christmas the pace never really lets up. He's persistent about wooing her, which I like. A lot. Josephine was pretty plucky too - from breaking off her engagement to Malcolm to getting engaged to Julius it was really only a matter of a few weeks.  Sure, her emotions swung about - but all things considered, she did a pretty good job of handling herself.  I adored the scene near the end when she had all the kids and teachers doing the conga. Cross-over characters Tane and Euphemia van Diederijk (from An Apple from Eve make an appearance - they now have two children). And now for the tough part. I have no idea what to rate this one.  It has lovely moments, delicious bits of prose and likeable characters...but for me it ends up being slightly forgettable. I think I'll go with a Boeuf en Croute (with maybe a side order of Queen of Puddings).

Fashion: Julius falls in love with her while she's wearing a wringing wet macintosh,  whoever thought up dinner jackets had him in mind, Jo bought knitting wool to make herself a chunky sweater in the Italian style, bridesmaid dresses of deep claret cotton velvet, were found at Laura Ashley, cream satin!!! wedding dress, silver grey taffeta party dress with a long skirt, scoop neckline and extravagantly puffed sleeves (which sounds so much like Princess Di's wedding dress.
Food: Apple crumble and cream, 'as nice a piece of 'am as I've seen for a long time and real cheese', tea that would drive a train, onion soup, homemade pate and toast, a morsel of trout, fresh caught from the river running through the hotel garden, Tournedos Rossini, homemade ice cream, chocolate orange creams, Vichyssoise, poulet chausseur, weak coffee and sandwiches that had been wrapped by a fiendish hand.