In the category: "One of the Easiest Plots to Remember": A Gentle Awakening. Betty Keira is spot on when she says that it's impossible to mix up the plot of this book with any other Neels....however, the name is less than memorable as it seems to be 3 Romance Novel Names Drawn From A Hat. If it had a name like "Florina's Revenge" or "The Half-Dutch Cordon Bleu Girl", then you'd really never forget it. Enough of that, and in honor of last night's Oscar's, let's get on with the fun.In the category "Book with the Worst Name for a House": A Gentle Awakening. Pemberly is a fine name for a house. Ogre's Relish is fantastic (dibs!), Wheel House is okay (although it sounds like something on a ship). But then we have: "...if the weather is fine he wants to take a picnic...He's asked the Meggisons from Butt House..." Really? How hard would it be to change - because that's the first thing I would do before moving in.[Betty Keira] I'm thinking of Green Gables and Manderley and Chidlake and Bleak House and Northanger Abbey...
Best PBS Fine Arts Special: "How many is too many when it comes to people in the kitchen?" Working well with other people in the kitchen is like a finely choreographed ballet....Cook #1 pirouettes to the stove as Cook #2 does a pas de deux with Cook #3 on the way to get something out of the refrigerator and freezer at the same time. Sou chef prepares vegetables at the prep sink....yeah, no. I can work with one other person...after that it starts to get messy. Gratuitously inviting several children at the same time into a kitchen is a recipe for disaster and should only be reserved for desperate birthday parties. I must be a wicked woman because I have to work hard at letting my kids help me in the kitchen. It doesn't flow organically from my good nature to pinch off a ball of dough for them to knead. When I let them help out we have five times the mess and half the speed and dispatch.Nature Documentary: Florina and Pauline feed the swans often ...we don't have a lot of swans in the Pacific Northwest...however, we do get a lot of ducks and geese. They tend to leave a lot of droppings. Just sayin'. And often-fed geese get very aggressive. I kept wondering if the swans ever became encroaching beggars.
Best Comeuppance in a Romance Novel featuring a Half-Dutch Cook: Florina dumps a pitcher
of lemonade on Wanda Fortesque. Wanda has just been unforgivably rude to Florina, so she defends herself...Wanda slaps her face....Florina dumps the lemonade. Priceless. Really. But the thought of having this scene repeated word for word to Sir William did make me squirm. Wanda does make it clear that Florina is sickening for him. [Betty Debbie] Betty Keira referred to "The Code of Womanhood"...which totally reminded me of "The Code of the Woosters". There should probably be a "Code of the Neels Hero", wherein heroes, much like Bertie Wooster, are not allowed to break engagements willy-nilly. Engagements are only to be broken by the evil fiancee - whether directly or by being caught snogging Larry the American.
Chase Scene: When racing back to his home to rescue Florina and his daughter Sir William calls the police so that they know why he's speeding and won't pull him over. Discuss. "Dear Police, I will be racing home in my 5 year old Ford Windstar Mini-van because my kid has a possible concussion. Please don't pull me over." Somehow I don't think it has the right ring to it. Dang. If only I had a Bentley. (Note* discuss possibility of getting a Bentley with Dr. van der Stevejinck ASAP.) My kids would have cheerios all over that Bentley if given half a chance so it's probably a function of Remarkable Fate that I have a Toyota mini-van. Since my kids are older, it wouldn't be Cheerios...they would want to borrow the car, and then they would wreck it, so I suppose Fate Takes a Hand in keeping me out of a Bentley.
Best Dumping Scene in a Romance featuring a Famous Paediatrician: Easily my second favorite scene...where Sir William engineers a plot to get Wanda to dump him. The plot involved a seemingly innocent introduction to an American millionaire (query: how many American mill
ionaires do you know?), a long muddy walk in the country, complete with nettles, a refusal to sell Wheel House and send Pauline off to boarding school. What's a Wanda to do? She is out of there faster than you can say "half-Dutch cordon bleu cook cum nanny". Sir William shows such creativity in the dumping. I am only surprised that he didn't do it earlier--though, Wicked Wanda probably wouldn't have thrown his engagement ring back at him while Florina was in the house. She would have hung on just for spite. I'm getting tired of calling him"Sir William". Let's call him Bill. Or, more formally, "Sir Billy".
Best Costumes: Sir William makes two appearances in his night clothes--described as "a splendid dressing gown" and a "rather grand dressing gown". I'm thinking olive green paisleys. What say ye? That's it
Most Pertinent Observation by a Five-Year-Old: Wanda could never be considered good step-mother material (which begs the question: What was William thinking?). Pauline observes, "...she's not like a mother, is she? She fusses about her clothes!" I daresay that could be fixed easily if she was willing to wear a zip-up nylon coverall for mother-daughter bonding.
Most Off-Note Ending for U.S. Mothers:
ReplyDeleteIsn't this the book where Pauline the small child is every where (read: underfoot in the kitchen) and seemingly the center of all that's important only to be dumped into boarding school and seen only on weekends once the parent figures marry?
(Still LOVE this book!
AND boarding school for all my kids on some days seems a lovely idea. . . .)
You're right! Little Pauline has happily agreed to be a weekly boarder and come home only on weekends...very convenient for the soon to be newlyweds.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you, some days boarding school sounds like a lovely idea. Unfortunately Dr.van der Stevejinck doesn't make nearly the kind of money that would take.
Okay, I have lots to say and very few wits left to say it in. Not to mention the fact that my Internet connection at the Royal Faulkner & York Hotel in Sidmouth on the south coast is a fickle son-of-a-gun. I'm on my fifth location; after being in our room, the bar & two lounges (think living room but slightly grander), I've settled in the hallway across from the stairs and with the receptionist within hailing distance. I can see the English Channel out the front door windows...
ReplyDeleteThere is a Mad Libs version of Betty Neels romance titles. I have to work it out. (I have to do this also for Susan Elizabeth Phillips titles, but I need to be a whole heck of a lot less jet-lagged...) But I agree "The One With the Half-Dutch Heroine" would peg this book precisely.
Anyone ever addressed mail to someone who lives in a rural community over here? Here's the address for Brit Hub 1.0's family's weekend place in Sussex:
Mants (name of the house)
Bedham (name of the cluster of houses/village)
Fittleworth (name of nearest next size large village)
Pulborough (name of actual town where the post is sorted)
Sussex (county, which is then followed by a post code that identifies a block's worth of houses, so why all the other names are needed is anyone's guess)
So, no lie, the name of the house is part of your address. And you can't change it easily. My brother in law lives in Shepherd's House, Naburn. There hasn't been a shepherd living there for over 100 years, and the nearest sheep are several hundred feet away. None the less...
My mother and I used to reckon it was the rare relationship that allowed two people to cook in the same kitchen. Frankly, as much as I love them, neither of the Brit Hubs has quite managed that. So I cook, they do the "washing up" (with a dishwasher, not at all a standard item in the average Brit kitchen).
Swans are definitely preferable to ducks & geese; they spend most of their time on the water. (There's a reason why they're so ungainly on land -- lack of practice.) Thus, less guano on land. (But don't swim in their pond!)
This is pure Regency-Era, isn't it: the girl is the only one who can break off an engagement. But I'll check with Brit Hub 1.0 whether the hideous Wanda would have had an alienation of affection cause of action...
Ooh, I was thinking about the "I'll just ring the police and let them know..." business. There had to have been speed cameras in 1988; no way he'd talk his way out of them. I'm thinking he just pays the fine and who cares.
I don't know about this version of the two-house problem: Clearly it's nice for Pauline to be in school in the country, but she's going to want to be with Sir William and Lady Sedley (Florina's married name), only he wants her with him and that's a problem as he's got to be in London during the week.
If Pauline's cool with boarding Monday-Thursday nights, it could work, but really I think they should pop her into a good preparatory school near their house in London.
I was wondering if there might be a "breach of promise" kind of thing...
ReplyDeleteI'm with you on the good prep school near their house in London.
Overlooking the English Channel. *sigh* I'm overlooking a whopping great pile of laundry.
I had to do a whopping great pile of laundry before we could leave for this trip. Does that count?
ReplyDelete