British Word of the Day

Verb

to be mother

1. (idiomatic, British) To pour out tea for others.

   Ah, here are the cakes and tea; shall I be mother?

She was given coffee and a selection of newspapers..."Good morning, Becky...Ah, here's Willem with more coffee. Be mother, Becky?"--The Promise of Happiness

In my humble opinion, there are few British phrases that sound as cozy as the above. Mijnheer Julius Teile van der Plotzing ter Taxx always asks demure Brit nurse to pour out. He doesn't turn it into a production but includes it in a series of inscrutable dance moves that make up the Dutch courtship ritual. All Dutch men are given an outline of it at puberty:

• Step One: Ignore her. (That's how she'll know she's the one for you.)
• Step Two: Insult her appearance. (Don't worry. She'll know what you mean.)
• Step Three: Invite her to Holland on the pretext of nursing a mildly ill family member.
• Step Four: Indicate your desire to get married soon and then compliment the next stunning blonde you see.
• Step Five: Ask her to tea. Ask her to be mother. (Get it. As in 'mother of your children'!)
• Step Six: Present the family heirloom sapphires with a well-timed spot of snogging. (You may be tempted to forgo the snogging but, trust us, it will save explanations.)